With my merry-go-round of wondering, I am wondering how certain people can get so spiritually and emotionally attached to one another that for nearly half a century there are still unspoken but nevertheless strong feelings passing back and forth between them. Sometimes I feel an intense yearning that comes over me, not because it's a feeling I've been having necessarily, but as though I am feeling it coming from another. When I sense that feeling, I think of just one person. Other times I feel frustrated, sort of trapped when there is no reason for me to feel that way. I am free as a bird. Other times I feel anxious when there's no reason for me to feel anxious. Just this weekend, I've felt sort of at loose ends, as if there is something to be completed, and a certain sadness, but I don't know what it means.
Perhaps someday I will learn the reasons for these feelings. In the meantime, I hope the feelings of hope, of dreams come true, of happy ever after endings is going the other way so I'm not the only one who is hopeful and smiling. I've always said "you can't make someone else love you", while at the same time believing you can't make someone stop loving you. Love and kisses. Jana
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